My dearest Sawyer

Today was not our day. It was long. It was hard. It tested my patience beyond what I thought possible. We struggled getting out of the house, we couldn't make a decision on lunch, you refused to eat, refused to come inside, and I had to manually remove you from your bath tonight. We spent the day arguing over what you wanted to drink, you struggled to explain your thoughts to me while I so badly tried to understand what exactly you wanted, you rode to town without pants because the fight to me at that point wasn't worth it, and nearly all day you wore but only one sock. The day was mentally and physically exhausting for the both of us. I was a mean mommy today. I didn't let you have your way with everything, I raised my voice, and I had to talk myself out of beating you pretty much all day long.

Tonight as I was nursing your baby sister to sleep and Daddy was trying to get you to sleep upstairs I could hear your screams "I want my mommy" at first I was annoyed that you still awake at 10:30 and were not fast asleep but as I came upstairs after hearing you for a good ten minutes and you still wouldn't calm down, I realized that I was not annoyed at all, I was indeed thankful. Thankful that after a day like today, with all the struggles, you still wanted me. As I laid beside you and held your trembling little body as you said "hold me tight" still crying and having trouble catching your breath, I realized that in that given moment there is no place I'd rather be. This toddler business is serious. Some days are good and some days are like this particular one. But at the end of the day, I'm still your Mommy and I love you will all my heart. I will "hold you tight" so long as you will let me and no matter the disagreements and struggles, I will always be here. Thank you for wanting me. 

All my love,

Mommy

To plant a garden or to not plant a garden...

If you have followed my blog for a while then you know that I do the occasional canning/freezing corn, tomatoes, and green beans. Year after year the idea to plant a garden arises about this time when everyone else is prepping their soil and getting ready to plant their veggies and year after year I steer clear of planting my own and yes, year after year when picking season hits and I have to go to buy my green beans and corn to put up I am kicking myself for not planting my own! So yet again here we stand mid April going back and forth with the idea. Here's the issue, I have sooo many projects around the farmhouse and the yard that it seems silly to add more work to my plate. But then there that idea that I love putting up fresh food for my little family. Oh decisions...decisions. Any helpful ideas to make my decision making easier? Send them my way peeps! I need ideas! Ahh, the struggle!

  

Cousin Love.

Having been blessed with very young parents, I never had many 1st cousins that were my age. I had one who ended up moving away around 2 years old. The next first cousin didn't come for another 9 years! Luckily for me I had a 2nd cousin that I was very close with but for the most part when at immediate family gatherings, I was a loner. Sure I got all the attention but there wasn't much kid action happening. I always longed to have other kids to play with when at Grandma's house! Luckily for my sweet babies, they aren't lacking in the cousin department! Today we had the whole family on my husbands side over for a fun day of food, birthdays, baby snuggles, and straight up cousin love! These kids are one fun loving, monkey climing, rowdy bunch! You can literally see the pure joy in their eyes when they are playing with each other. I can't tell ya'll how incredibly happy it makes me seeing these sweet little Bohall's playing and making memories that will last them a lifetime! The bond that they share is seriously the cutest thing my eyes have ever seen. And did I mention how stinking adorable they all are?!? Well here are some pictures to prove it!

Ellie belly + Jojo loving the wagon!

Bohall babies -3!

Little dare devil!

Bales + Jojo.

What a beautiful day it was here in Indiana! I sure hope you all had a wonderful day spent outdoors and making memories with your own families!☺️

Xoxo- Ashley

Not one ounce of me will ever regret it!

While spending time with my Mama today many topics came up in conversation. One topic in particular has had me reflecting on my parenting all day. Sure everyone's parenting is different but if you are a parent or are a person who plans to parent and has a specific idea about how you plan to do so then you are probably well aware that not every one will agree with your techniques. This being so in my case. I am currently laying in bed with my ever so sweet, soundly sleeping two year old beside me and my 10 month old in her crib right beside my bed, within arms reach. Many disagree, and that's ok. But you know what? This is what works for us. I'm not a "cry it out" kind of mom. Matter of fact, my children rarely cry for more than 2 minutes without me coming to the rescue. Here's my reasoning (not that I need one) as to why this works for us and I don't hold to them sleeping in their own rooms. One day, not so far away, more like in the blink of an eye, that sweet, soundly sleeping little boy is going to be all grown up and out and about with buddies when it's time to be tucked into bed. That baby within arms reach is going to be across the hall too busy on her cell phone to even realize I said goodnight and I for one don't want to be the old Mama laying down in bed with a single ounce of me regretting the time I got to lay with them in my arms when they were babies! Have you ever heard a Mom with grown children say she regretted all those times her babies climbed up in bed with her? I would about bet not. Just as I have never heard a Mom with grown children say she regretted rocking her children to sleep. I hear the argument that children will never want to leave if you let them sleep with you. My response to that is, if I have a 16 year old son that still wants to sleep with his Mama than we have a far bigger problem anyways. I don't see that being a problem for long and I about bet that they will willingly find themselves leaving my bed before jr.high lol! 

For now this is how we do. You do you. You do what works for your family. You rock those babies to sleep without an ounce of regret. Time is all we have, and not very much of it. I will snuggle my babies so long as they will let and not a single ounce of me will regret it!

Ps. Thank you to my Mama who rocked me to sleep so many years ago. I think I turned out just fine.😉😘 Love you!

Xoxo- S & E's Mama 

A baby boy is on the way!

Hi folks! So long time no read, right? Well I'm back for a minute to share with you a special occasion that I took the pleasure in hosting this past weekend, a baby shower for my amazing sister and precious soon to be nephew, Ryder! 

Ryder's Mommy + Daddy love to fish and spend time at the lake so obviously we had to throw a fishing themed baby shower of course! Here are a few pictures of the party!😊 Hope you enjoy!

Beautiful Momma to be!

 We can't wait to meet you Ryder! 

Xoxo-

Auntie Ashley 

Nursing top turns lingerie.

*Notice* This post is not of my typical literature around here. Dad- if you're reading this, please close out now. 

Ok...

If you find yourself being referred to as Mommy, chances are you have heard (and know well) the term "Parent Sex". In the rare occasion or the slight chance that you have not, let me bring you up to date with the term. The term "Parent Sex" {although not found in Websters} is the deifnition of sexual intercourse after becoming parents, the 10 minutes you get between feeding one baby before the other wakes up, or in some cases, the time before morning nap ends and lunch begins. That short segment of time that requires all-hands-on-deck if you will. Hitting "it" before hitting the pillow-as if your eyes hadn't seen sleep in 3 damn days. We all know of it and some of us know it all too well! Which brings me to my next point. That sexy lingerie that you got as a gift at your bachelorette party before you got married. You know that cute purple one with the lace top and matching panties that you keep tucked away with the other "fun" stuff that never gets used in the round box under your bed. The one you wore a couple times (on special occasions) before the rascals came along. Chances are unless you have an all night baby sitter and really feel like doing Daddy a favor, you will never wear it again! After all, do you really want to spend the first 5 minutes of your 10 minute "parent sex" segment frantically searching for the box, dusting the top off, and putting on a sexy piece of lingerie that clearly doesn't fit as well as it used to?! I think not. 

As Momma's we beat ourselves up trying to overcome the stereotypical "anything but sexy" mom look, when in reality our men find us sexy regaurdless of how rough we seem in our nursing tank covered in today's lunch, tonight's dinner, and whatever the 3 footer had on his hand when he came running to the kitchen wiping them all over your back while you were trying to clean up! 

My proposal is this-Let yourself be sexy in that nursing tank! Unsnap those sides like a boss! Know that your baby isn't the only one that finds that easy access to be helpful and appreciated! That nursing tank turns the tables for Momma's who think they've fallen victim to tee shirt sex! Not anymore ladies! Let that nursing tank turn lingerie for you today!

I hope you found enjoyment and humor out of this as much as I did while writing it! 

XoXo-

Boobfed tank lover<3

Before you throw in the towel.

I am not a marriage counselor today, I won't be tomorrow, and I wasn't one yesterday. I don't have a PhD in family counseling. I never studied marriage psychology. I am not an expert on how to deal with relationship struggles and I do not know everyone's past. I realize that some marriages are over long before they ever begin. I also realize that certain instances and situations leave people with no choice but to throw in the towel on their marriage. I am not naive in thinking that everyone can have some fairy tale marriage with hugs, kisses, and happiness everyday. I know life's struggles. I know what it's like to want show my husband the love I have inside but day after day life gets in the way. I know what it's like realizing it's time for bed and I have yet to give my husband a kiss. I know what it's like to argue over taking the trash out, getting the kids ready, and spending money! 

I may not have all of the credentials to give the best advice in a time of need but I do however, have a faith that is strong enough to help me withstand the fails of marriage and help me to realize just what it takes to uphold a marriage within the storm. I can tell you this much...no one works harder or longs for your marriage to succeed more than the Lord himself. He fights for us daily and if you just give him a chance to work within your marriage you may find that loving your spouse is a little easier each day. I find myself drifting occasionally from keeping God #1 in our marriage and for that, not only I, but my entire family suffer the consequences. 

I have had my share of watching marriages crumble within the walls of love and time after time I look for an answer as to why. Why did the love disappear? What happen to get them to the point of no return? Regardless of the circumstances that lead to divorce, there is alway one common denominator...God was not #1. Seems so simple but yet so hard for us to obtain. Why is that? Why is it so easy to let God slip from being #1? Honestly, I do not have that answer and plan on spending the rest of my life trying to figure that out! 

Before you throw in the towel on your marriage...let God into your marriage, let him be #1, love him more than you love yourself, your husband, and your family. Marriage is not easy, it may in fact be the hardest thing you ever work for. No matter who's against you, never forget that God is always for you. He is always in your corner. Always rooting for your marriage. Wanting nothing more than to see your marriage succeed! 

-Ashley