I'm an ooey gooey hot mess!

Ok Mommas! As many of you know my 2nd bundle of sweet, pure, precious, and overwhelming joy is just days away from entering this world. I will soon become a Momma to two precious babies! My heart overflows with joy and anticipation as we plan the arrival of our sweet Eleanor! The past few weeks I have spent countless hours planning and arranging for her arrival, I have also found myself obsessing over my precious little Sawyer even more than ever, which to be honest I didn't know was possible! This obsession possibly spawns from the unknown of raising two babies vs one or perhaps it's the hint of guilt I often find myself dealing with in knowing that I am taking the status of only child away from my Sawyer, unknowing how he will respond. The guilt is quickly reversed when I think of how precious the two of them will be together and how much I know he will love his little sister once she is here! My anxiety level has heighten to say the least with this pregnancy, more so than my first! I was a hot mess then yes, but this time around I literally find myself dwelling on tragic life events or possible happenings to the point of making myself ill! Hopefully these feeling will pass and I can return back to normal once my hormones get back in check! 

Shew! Being a Momma is hard work yes, but the feelings that go along with it...Lordy Lordy! Although all the anxiety and stress in the world can not compare to the joy and happiness a baby brings!!

Ya'll I can't begin to describe the love I have for this child. I literally look at him and my heart melts into a huge ooey gooey puddle of a hot mess! When that little face wakes up in the morning and says "hi momma" in a sleepy voice that is faint and light, my heart feels like it explodes inside my chest! The phrase I could just eat you up takes a whole new meaning, literally! As in literally child, I could eat your face because you are the most precious things I've ever seen! I could give you 10 million kisses and it still wouldn't be enough! 

Oh and did I mention the breath?! Yes I know I'm weird but seriously ya'll I love the smell of my child's breath! And don't even get me started on the gap between those teeth! Ok I could seriously go on for days but you get the point...it's an obsession! This child has brought meaning to my life and the purest happiness I have ever felt! He is my greatest accomplishment and I pray that we, with the help of God, can raise him to be a God loving, honest, independent, and hardworking man! I can't wait to experience double the love! It's hard to even imagine having all these thoughts and feelings X2! 

How will I even manage!?! My assumption is I will spend sleepless nights staring into the sweet faces that wake up and call me Momma. 

Xoxo- Ashley